Writer vs. Spellchecker

So, in the writing group I’m part of, the King’s Daughters’ Writing Camp, we talked about how spellchecker isn’t actually 100% accurate. I ended up writing these mini-stories because of it.

Enjoy!

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Characters

Writer (aka me): Protagonist

Spellchecker: Antagonist

Grammar Book: Spellchecker’s nemesis. Usually annoyed at Spellchecker.

Red Pen: *clueless*

Black Pen: *also clueless*

Writer’s Block: Spellchecker’s comrade. Usually just sits around.

Plot bunny: Cinnamon roll who tries to be helpful by giving Writer ideas. Usually used by Spellchecker to distract writer.

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The Trouble of Then & Than

Writer: Then-
Spellchecker: THAN
Writer: No, it’s then. In this specific sentence, it’s THEN.
Spellchecker: takes out red pen THAN
Writer: Oh, so it’s war, now, eh? takes out grammar book and black pen HAVE AT THEE, YOU MISCHIEVOUS NEVER-DO-WELL!!

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Sleepy Spellchecker

Writer: I’ll be fine.
Spellchecker: I’ll is fine.
(Me, the writer/narrator: I think that’s what spellchecker was trying to get me to say, not I is fine like I’ve been thinking. I don’t remember)
Writer: Are-are you sleep-deprived?
Spellchecker: No.
Writer: I don’t think that’s true. 

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Contractions Or No Contractions

Spellchecker: In formal writing, try-
Writer: MY WRITING IS NOT FORMAL
Spellchecker: IT IS THE PROPER WAY
Writer: PEOPLE DON’T TALK LIKE THAT ANYMORE
Spellchecker: DO NOT
Writer: DON’T
Spellchecker: DO NOT
Grammar book: facepalming

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Writer’s Block

Writer: ARGH
SPELLCHECKER’S COMRADE HAS ARRIVED
WRITER’S BLOCK!!

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To Be Concise or Not To Be Concise

Writer: In the midst of helping-
Spellchecker: During or Amid.
Writer: No.
Spellchecker: More concise language-
Writer: I’m sure the readers understand what I’m talking about.
Spellchecker: *glares at me as I press ignore*

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Attack of The Plot Bunny

Writer: *happily writing*
Spellchecker: *pouting in the corner*
Plot bunny: *hops into room*
Writer: *gets up to get a snack*
Writer: Where did you get that plot bunny???
Spellchecker: *grinning evilly* Why, it is my pet!
Writer: Your…pet?
Spellchecker: *chuckles evilly* Yessss…yesssss…would you like to hold it?
Writer: No.
Spellchecker: Why not? It is fluffy and cuddly.
Writer: Because it’ll distract me.
Spellchecker: EXCELLENT! *throws bunny*
Writer: catches it NO-WAIT-awww, you’re adorable. NO! MUSTN’T GET ANY NEW IDEAS!
Spellchecker: *is ‘correcting’ Writer’s story.*
Writer: HEY! STOP IT RIGHT THERE, YOU FIEND!!!

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That’s it for now! Tune in next time when Spellchecker cooks up another dastardly deed!